Hey everyone!
How are things? I hope that you had a good weekend, all rested up for a new week! I know that it's not the easiest to be optimistic about going back to school/work/daily schedules after the weekend, but remember, it's all about perspective. Plus,I know a thing or two about perspective. After dealing with this lightheadedness for almost a year now, I realized how much I actually really like school! I am very blessed to go to a small private Christian school where people seem genuinely concerned about my health, my peers are nice, and I have a good bunch of friends. When I miss school, I notice that I enjoy school more now because it's a good environment.
Art credit: (http://nottya1011.tumblr.com/post/72441881400)
Of course, lightheadedness is not easy to deal with, but it does have its perks! For instance: if I don't want to go to a social event-I have a real excuse not to go! I was so happy to not go to a small party I was invited to! Secondly, sometimes I sit outside of class because it gets so bad. This means that if I don't want to see people and am lightheaded, I have an instant escape! Of course, these people are all nice that I'm talking about, it's just that I need time by myself. I like people, I really do! I enjoy small groups of people that I can confide in and relate to.
But there's a catch. I can't go places on the weekend anymore because of it. These days, I can't go into a store for more than five minutes, and whenever I think of going somewhere, I don't really look forward to it anymore because I know that I'll be constantly feeling like I'll be passing out.
Lesson learned through this? Everything happens for a reason. I know that this phrase is used often, but it does have great value to it! Through dealing with it, I am putting more trust in God. Whether it's through struggling grades, feeling a bit cooped up because of my lightheadedness, or through not getting my way, I'm learning to trust that God knows better than I do. Believe me when I say that when things aren't going right, they're that way because God knows exactly what you need.
I am glad that God knows me better than I know myself because of all the things that I am scared of, He uses those fears to bring me out of them. For instance, did you know that passing out is one of my top fears? What am I dealing with right now? Yep, it's lightheadedness! And this year, math was really hard. I recently got a "d" on my test and completely freaked out. It wasn't a completely fair situation either, but I"m sure the teacher is having a hard time because of this class. Did you know that bad grades is also one of my top fears? Thankfully, I will most likely end with an "a" in the class, and am so relieved. Lastly, I want to attend a Korean class, starting next week. (No, I am not a koreaboo!) If I keep having my lightheadedness, it will be very difficult to go to this class, and I will probably have to quit it because of my situation. However, what is God trying to teach me here? He put lightheadedness in my life for a reason above my understanding, and although it's easy to get frustrated about it, I'm learning to trust the process. Plus, I am excited to see what He's doing and what He'll do with it.
Art credit: (https://www.etsy.com/listing/217385719/kikis-delivery-service-flying-near-the)
So, no matter what, always believe that everything will be ok. As Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose." God knows what He's doing! It's never a surprise to Him when things don't go well, and if something is going well, that that doesn't mean that a bad thing has to happen in order to compensate for the good. (Anyone else think like this?)
And anyways...You got this! Through God, you've been able to make it this far, and if you doubt that God isn't recognizing the things you want Him to notice, then you got to remember the perspective thing I talked to you about earlier. You've made it this far, and God isn't done yet. He has amazing things in store for you, if you only but listen and obey.